not a bear

digging for something

anything 

to make me feel again-

pinpricks in my fingers

stabbing into my stomach

an endless cycle

that you don’t seem to get.

there’s an anger for you, 

dad. 

for how many years

did you suffer through this?

Did you not know

that your blood runs in me too?

Your affliction is not yours alone,

and I’ll never forgive what you did

or rather

didn’t